AAAIIIIEEEEEE!

CRUZ BAY, U.S. Virgin Islands - Actress Renee Zellweger, who played the lovelorn title character in "Bridget Jones's Diary," was married Monday to country music star Kenny Chesney in a small ceremony on the Caribbean island of St. John in the U.S. Virgin Islands.

No, no no! She just broke up with Jack White! Kid Various was just about to make his move!

Renee! Baby! You're mine! Mine, I say!



Kid Various must get gun...

Must kill country music star...

Disclaimer: Kid Various has no actual desire to kill Kenny Chesney for marrying Renee Zellweger.
Just for being a country music star...