The Onion Movie?

I recently discovered that The Onion, the great satirical newspaper featuring countless stories about "area" men and women, and inspiration for the irony loving editors of the Idiom, is being made into a movie. I don't really think that a movie based on The Onion is such a great idea though. How do you turn The Onion, with all its ever changing component stories, into a movie? You would need someone like Robert Altman who's good at directing movies with multiple intertwining stories to direct, and someone who's also, you know, actually funny. Altman hasn't directed anything funny since MASH. Wasn't he supposed to move to France anyway with Alec Baldwin or something? In any event, Mr. Surly will try to keep an open mind about the "Untitled Onion Movie." After all these are the folks who wrote this classic headline about the 1969 moon landing: "Holy Shit, Man Lands on Fucking Moon!" Couldn't have said it better myself.